By Colleen Daugherty, MA, MS, LMHCA

Walking Through the Fire: How Therapy Supports Healing During Divorce

Divorce is more than a legal ending—it’s often one of the most disorienting and emotionally complex transitions a person can experience. It’s not just the loss of a relationship; it’s the unraveling of a shared life, the collapse of long-held dreams, and the overwhelming task of rebuilding a future you never planned for.

As a trauma therapist, I’ve walked alongside many clients through this kind of pain. But I’ve also known it personally. A few years ago, my own world changed in an instant. I came across something that made it undeniably clear my marriage was over. In that moment, everything I had been trying to hold together fell apart.

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There are many growing pains in those weeks, months and years after a divorce occurs. Ex-spouses adjust to their new normal and often experience feelings of fear, sadness, relief, joy and confusion as they try to rebuild their lives. During this time, they may also find themselves in situations where they are still communicating to each other in ways that contributed to the divorce. These interactions are often combative, malicious and hurtful. Unfortunately, many of the negative characteristics that were present in the failed marriage will often transfer over to the post-divorce relationship, which, in turn, continue to affect the children.

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